BROKEN HEART

ALLOW ME TO EXPLAIN A BROKEN HEART :

A BROKEN HEART is when you actually refuse to get out of bed in the morning because you are afraid of the reality that awaits you.

A BROKEN HEART is when you think about the individual that broke your heart constantly. You reminisce the "Good Times" almost as if the "Bad Times" never existed.

A BROKEN HEART is when you are crying yourself to sleep every night & yet crying more & more each morning.

A BROKEN HEART is the unforgettable smell of his shirt that sits in that empty box; stowed away.

A BROKEN HEART is the cold shattering feeling you receive when you hear the syllables of his name.

A BROKEN HEART is glancing at the pictures of the two of you, & then quickly turning your attention to something else to avoid your tears.

A BROKEN HEART is re-reading his ancient letters & putting away the jewelry that he once bought for you.

A BROKEN HEART is secretly wanting to run back to him & secretly wanting to just be loved by him again.

A BROKEN HEART is asking desperately for just one last chance with the only person responsible for your loneliness.

A BROKEN HEART is pretending to not care what his friends are saying about you.

A BROKEN HEART is forcing yourself to hang up the phone after you have dialed the first three digits to his number.

A BROKEN HEART is screaming & begging for a second chance inside.

A BROKEN HEART is the emptiness & heart-wrenching feeling you encounter when you see him with his new love.

A BROKEN HEART is knowing that no matter what you do or say to yourself, you can't fool your heart into believing that you will in fact "Be Alright."

A BROKEN HEART is seeing him, & even though it may be the hardest thing that you have ever had to do, you decide to walk away.

A BROKEN HEART is listening to that one song that makes you break down over & over again.

A BROKEN HEART sometimes means: not wanting to go on.

Have you ever and what would you do?

Have you ever wondered which hurts the most:
Have you ever wanted to love someone with everything you had, but that person was to afraid to let you? Too many of us stay walled up because we are to afraid to care too much... for fear that the other person does not care as much, or at all...

Have you ever denied your feelings for someone because you fear of rejection was too hard to face it? Afraid of what we don't know, afraid of what others will think, afraid of what will be found out about us. But everytime we tell a lie... the thing we fear grows stronger.

Thing to let you know about:
1. You will always be the answer, when somebody asks me what I'm thinking about now and then.
2. I know everyone wants to be the sun that lights up your life everyday. But I rather be your moon and you know why? So that I can shine on you during your darkest time when your sun isn't around.
3. The worst feeling isn't being lonely. It's being forgotten by someone you would never forget.

What would you do...
'What would you do if everytime you wanted someone they would never be there?
'What would you do if you best friend died tomorrow and you never got the chance to tell them how you felt?
'What would you do if you had done all that you can but still can't touch your love one hearts?
'What would you do if you loved someone more than ever and you couldn't have them?
'What would you do if everytime you fell in love you had to say good-bye?


When you love someone just say it. Say it loud. Say it right away, or the moment just passes you by and you may never get the chance again.

Yes It true people live, but people die too

The Story of Love that never tells

10th grade

As I sat there in English class, I stared at the girl next to me. She was my so called "best friend". I stared at her long, silky hair, and wished she was mine. But she didn't notice me like that, and I knew it. After class, she walked up to me and asked me for the notes she had missed the day before and handed them to her. She said "thanks" and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I wanted to tell her, I want her to know that I don't want to be just friends, I love her but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why.

11th grade
The phone rang. On the other end, it was her. She was in tears, mumbling on and on about how her love had broke her heart. She asked me to come over because she didn't want to be alone, so I did. As I sat next to her on the sofa, I stared at her soft eyes, wishing she was mine. After 2 hours, one Drew Barrymore movie, and three bags of chips, she decided to go to sleep. She looked at me, said "thanks" and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I want to tell her, I want her to know that I don't want to be just friends, I love her but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why.

Senior year
The day before prom she walked to my locker. My date is sick" she said; he's not going to go well, I didn't have a date, and in 7th grade, we made a promise that if neither of us had dates, we would go together just as "best friends". So we did. Prom night, after everything was over, I was standing at her front door step. I stared at her as she smiled at me and stared at me with her crystal eyes. I want her to be mine, but she isn't think of me like that, and I know it. Then she said "I had the best time, thanks!" and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I want to tell her, I want her to know that I don't want to be just friends, I love her but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why.

Graduation Day
A day passed, then a week, then a month. Before I could blink, it was graduation day. I watched as her perfect body floated like an angel up on stage to get her diploma. I wanted her to be mine, but she didn't notice me like that, and I knew it. Before everyone went home, she came to me in her smock and hat, and cried as I hugged her. Then she lifted her head from my shoulder and said, "you're my best friend, thanks" and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I want to tell her, I want her to know that I don't want to be just friends, I love her but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why.

A Few Years Later
Now I sit in the pews of the church. That girl is getting married now. I watched her say "I do" and drive off to her new life, married to another man. I wanted her to be mine, but she didn't see me like that, and I knew it. But before she drove away, she came to me and said "you came!". She said "thanks" and kissed me on the cheek. I want to tell her, I want her to know that I don't want to be just friends, I love her but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why.

Funeral
Years passed, I looked down at the coffin of a girl who used to be my "best friend". At the service, they read a diary entry she had wrote in her high school years. This is what it read: I stare at him wishing he was mine, but he doesn't notice me like that, and I know it. I want to tell him, I want him to know that I don't want to be just friends, I love him but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why. I wish he would tell me he loved me! `I wish I did too...` I thought to my self, and I cried.

Me! Myself!

I thought, in the back of my mind, that the daily working this month might slow time down a bit (or give the feeling of time passing more slowly, to be more accurate) but here we suddenly are at Friday again. It put me in mind of something recently said when it was bedtime. “Why is the clock it just goes round and round all day!”

I actually looking for a way out, I strikes me how this is just another love. Looking for a way out of the searching is a love in itself. Whenever I thought I had found a way out, and relax in that, it's just the calm before the storm. I can see this pattern in me now. It feel so not me and myself. Even the day shine but in me I feel like nothing different much.

Please set me free and leave me alone! I just want back my life, my friend, my time, my trust, my own way of direction.

This is a quote from my dear Joyce Ng "hurt makes the happiness more true!"

Last day of holiday!

31-10-08 is the last day of holiday for me. Time goes by so fast, people go in and out of my life. I never miss the opportunity to tell these people how much they mean to me.
Starting 1st of Nov onwards I have to build up my career in different way. Work, work, work. Work makes the time pass. Time makes work pass even faster. I just wish that a new life for me and a new feeling for me.